Is Life a Plot?

Date: Jan. 25, 2005
From: MJS

This is a quote from Joseph Campbell. “It takes courage to do what you want. Other people have a lot of plans for you.” Further on he says, “When you look back on your life, it looks as though it were a plot, but when you are into it, it’s a mess, just one surprise after another. Then later you see it was perfect. So, I have a theory that if you are on your own path things are going to come to you… everything that happens is a surprise and is timely.”

Do you find your life makes sense as though it has a plot? Did you also get to do what you wanted to do? How much choice do we have?

Date: Jan. 27, 2005
From: PC

I like that quote from Joseph Campbell, and at time I did feel that life was a plot, an ugly plot at that. But I have been on my own path and learned a lot of lessons. I became a nurse, travelled, and I am finally getting the fruits of doing the work of being a single parent. The boys are doing quite well. My daughter in law has really grown a lot too and we had a really pleasant time together recently. She has learned to cook with all natural foods, avoiding salt, most meat and milk products, and now she feels so much better. She is just bubbly!

The only thing I didn’t get was a truly loving, caring husband, but I think that is rare anyway. But I learned and have grown so much as an individual! Things could have been much tougher than they were. I also found my wonderful relationship with the Lord, His goodness and mercy and never-ending faithfulness to provide for and guide me.

I have signed up to help at a home for unwed mothers, cooking, rocking and feeding babies, or be a housemother when the supervisors need a break. It surprises me that you want a dog, but I know my animals are good for me. They make me move, and someone has to talk to them!

Feb. 2, 2005
From: JB

Seems like one of the questions I passed going through your emails is "Have I done what I wanted?" with my life.  Probably - mostly - I think I am where I am supposed to be and with whom I am supposed to be, arriving ultimately in the place to cross lives with my spouse at the time in my life that I did.  Being here in the desert has been good for me too.  I have met some terrific folks and shared in their lives. 

 




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A Common Knot in Life?

January 31, 2005
From: MJS

One of my friends is writing her autobiography, an exercise good for the soul for anyone, I think. She has run into a block at the point where she meets the man she marries. I had the same experience in writing my life story. What happens at that point that is so difficult to put into words for us?

My first thought is that we are not honest with ourselves when we meet these wonderful potential spouses. The old “love is blind” cliché comes to mind. We blind ourselves, or maybe we’d never commit our lives, our bodies, and all our resources to that path with another if we saw them clearly. We marry the person as we imagine him to be, or wish him to be.

Then I concluded that nature’s own will to survive has a hand in this instinctual coming together, forming a new family, procreating and so on. Sex drives overcome our intellectual sense. We “fall” for it literally. All our romantic stories reinforce the “love story”, the giving in to love. Months, or maybe years later, we wake up to the reality of the difficulties of maintaining life paths together. Then you really come to love the other person, or not. But by then the children are there too, and if you love them, you do what you have to in order to maintain the family for their sakes. Or maybe you don’t, if that family is so unhealthy that it isn’t worth any sacrifice for. Or you stay married, longer than the children are with you, and then you have to figure out how to live together all over again as older adults.

So years later, when you trying to write about that time of courtship, you find you don’t really know what happened! Did this happen to you too?

Joseph Campbell counsels us to “follow your bliss”, but following the bliss there is hard work and sacrifice to make it all work out for the best. It’s not all blissful.




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Labyrinth Walking

Date: Jan. 31, 2005
From: MJS

A few years ago I did my first labyrinth walk, which I was so excited about to share with you. When I completed that first walk, I thought, “So what?” Then a few hours’ later insights flowed in! It is a metaphor for Life, for birth and death cycles, for walking with companions, and so many other ideas.

I ask myself now, how does this work?

We each become accustomed to our energy patterns and habits, uniquely ours. I think to voluntarily walk a labyrinth is to disrupt one’s energy patterns just a little, then rest, then a little more. There is just enough disruption to allow in new thoughts, and if the walker has meditated on some particular problem or scripture or prayer, then that is where the insight comes into. The same thing happens when we listen well to a sermon or pep talk or health class, and take it to heart, but those ideas come from outside sources. Our teachers, whoever they are, including TV, books, movies, etc., influence us when we allow it. The labyrinth puts you in touch with yourself.

As with what happens riding on a merry go round too much, one suffers from too much of a good thing! Once I walked the Labyrinth four times in one day, which resulted in headache and upset stomach. Such a consequence should be obvious, but I learned it the hard way! All the turns throw off the internal gyroscope that we each have. So a labyrinth walk once in a while is a good thing, but repetitions too close together are probably NOT! I thought I ought to caution you, who experienced and enjoyed the labyrinth walk, not to overdo at some future time. Many want to do it again, right away, but it is best used with caution.





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Insight into One Women's Retreat

Date: January 31, 2005
From: MJS

I attended a Women’s Retreat over the past weekend, a time both full and rich with learning, conversation, laughter and renewal. But the one insight I really want to hold on to is that God is Love is Radiance is Light.

Joseph Campbell on videotape was describing how every culture and people is seaching for an understanding of God, and we find their religious concepts embodied in their art, their stories, their liturgies and rituals, their patterns of life. But God is neither outside it all, nor contained in it all. None of those attempts at explanations is adequate because we just cannot comprehend It. Campbell smiled broadly, and passed the fingers of one hand through the fingers of the other: God is Radiant Light, passing through all those cultural depictions and we get a glimpse each time.

That same Radiant Light passes through each of us, and we must be transparent for others to see God in us: transparent is to be without deceipt or bitterness or anger or hatreds or judgements. I hope I can hang on to that!




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Write Anything

Date: Jan 19, 2005
From: MJS
To: JB


Sue Monk Kidd has only the one fiction book, Secret
Life of Bees. All the others are reflective, “Dance of
the Dissident Daughter” being best known in that line.
Prior to that she was in turmoil, as her husband was a
Minister, now in private counseling practice. I read that
book twice, and it really impacted me. I stopped going
to church for a while, to get some objectivity about
why I was going to church.

Sure you should write something! It gets better as you do it.

I read a piece by Norman Mailer and another by a woman
author, both saying essentially the same thing: first
you write your own stories. That sort of clears you
for other efforts. Good therapy too, I bet. Sam Keen
(“Hymns to Unknown God”) counsels us to write our
autobiography, our soul journey record. I find I
learn a lot about myself when I try to put it into
words. Some of the thoughts sort of harden, and
others just get thrown out forever. Anyway, on
account of Keen I collected my personal writings
together and the stories of "past lives" which may be
real in the sense of emotions but not facts, and that
leaves me free for flights of fancy... maybe. I was
terrible at any kind of fiction in school. I think that
was because I needed to examine my present reality
first, just like Keen recommended. Nothing really terrible
happened at all during my youth, except what happens to most people as
we go through periods of undeveloped self esteem, and
one does not really want to go there. Well, some
people wallow in those places. But I don't, being a
Pollyanna, I wanted to stay on the sunny side of
things, and therefore needed to take a good look to
get the value out of every experience of life.

So write anything. Unfortunately I find that having
set that purpose, the Spirit wakes me at all hours
with nudges to write it down. If I ignore it, I am
kept awake, or I forget that great moment. So I am
doing a lot of insomniac writing.





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Opposite of Fate

Date; Jan. 20, 2005
From: MJS


I am enjoying reading “The Opposite of Fate” by Amy Tan. I really identify with so much of her experience as a writer. She describes how images or a few words bother her until she starts in using them, and then everything just flows out! She tells at length how the universe seems to conspire to give her exactly what she needs in terms of research or contacts or even time and space. I have that same experience!

But what woke me in the night was the understanding of how deadly is a total commitment to some routines I have, how they would forestall me from the creative process. For instance, it is very good that I keep the house well, provide regular healthy meals to us, exercise daily and keep up with my social life. I think I should sleep eight hours at night. But it’s also important to drop all that when the Universe gives me a push to do other things. I have already brushed my teeth and made the bed every day for sixty years. Who cares? In the long run it really won’t matter, as there are no prizes for sleeping uninterrupted through every night of life. Quite the contrary! So I am delighted to be awake inspired at 2 a.m., having the time and space to myself to think through carefully what I need to say, and to do it well, and then of course, to do it over and over again until it is as perfect as I can make it. Then there is usually yet another revision.

Routines, even good ones, are a kind of self-indulgence. They make the time pass quickly, especially if you want time to go away or if you are numbing yourself. Many people think the weather should be the same year to year, and not deviate too far from some “norm”. They feel tricked by Nature if there’s an earthquake, or they know the global temperature has risen a couple degrees in the past century. Everyone is supposed to fall within some small range of numbers regarding their blood level of cholesterol. Nature doesn’t have our attachment to keeping things the same! Those big routines are just our expectations. I am ready to be surprised! I am for life. I am for change, which is what life is all about.

Of course, I do like my daily morning paper and coffee, and living free of great disasters. But it is change, newness and possibilities that get me up every morning to see the Universe is up to now.




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Silent Partner

From: JB
Date: Jan 16, 2005

Sometimes living with a silent partner leave toooo much time for thought development. Yesterday evening the thoughts that developed in me were very hurtful and unpleasant. I finally erupted about 11 p.m. Of course I regret it and I am remorseful, but if there is a great lack in our relationship, I can’t expect him to do anything about it if he doesn’t know, right? Well, he knows. We have had the same conversation at least once or twice a year for the past ten years anyway. I NEED CONVERASATION AND PARTICIPATION! Then again, he’s not out running around on me, doesn’t drink, thump on me, boss me, spend all our money and he willingly goes with me to all family functions and anywhere else (except the grocery store). He is clean and healthy. Jeeze, what have I to complain about!!!

From: MJS
Date: Jan 16, 2005

Do you ever hear men talk about anything other than politics, sports or business? Our grandmother told me: “Keep your women friends. You will need them.” I think she was referring to this very problem of male-female differing communication needs. Women multi-task and multi-communicate. Men are just focused and simple. That’s oversimplifying, of course. I too am learning to bring stuff up to my husband when it isn’t even clear to me yet, just intuitive little pushes that some emotional dishonesty is going on. It’s helping a lot. We’re still adjusting to retirement life.

When you have time, check out Sue Monk Kidd’s website. She has lots of great stuff. I would like to have that Book Club discussion of the Secret Life of Bees all over again. Also look at one called Tiferet, about a journal of spiritual writings from various faith orientations, including poetry, fiction and non-fiction. The sample writings are very interesting.





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Not Old as the Hills Anyway

Date: Jan. 15, 2005
From: MJS


I got an email from a friend Bob today, directing me to a website where I was to put in my birthdate, and then it told me what famous people were older or younger than I and by how much, and some of the important events that occurred during my life time, starting with the bombing of Hiroshima, progressing through our first space walks, the assassination of President Kennedy, the turn of the millennium and 9-11, of course. That list didn’t make me feel any older, really, and certainly doesn’t reflect well on the human race. He left out the happenings of the expulsion of the Dalai Lama from Tibet and the finagling of Vatican II, and how those events brought Eastern and Western spirituality into the global consciousness.
When I visit the desert, or the mountains, or talk to the trees, or consider the stars, I feel really young! And I am still excited about the evolution of life on earth, though it seems pretty brutal at times. I think we are gathering some wisdom, that we are moving towards some sense of worldwide unity. I am really hopeful about everything.
But you can check out that website. Who and what significant events do you think should be there?

Date: Jan. 15, 2005
From: JB

Did you know the layers of millenniums are visible in the walls of the Grand Canyon as several feet of sediment, also to be seen in the walls of the side canyons at Lake Powell, but only a few inches or a foot thick there? That layer stretches like taffy as it moves east and north, thinning. It’s fascinating to observe. I love geology and oceanography.
I find my God’s presence so easy to feel when observing nature. Then there are no distractions of man-made ornaments or ritual as in churches. We once found a magnificent cathedral in a small detached portion of Zion Park, called Kolab Canyon, in Utah. We hiked about three miles in to it and were all alone there. Wow, it still gives me goosebumps remembering the feeling there!




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The Will to Survive

Date: January 14, 2005
From: MJS

Littered with dead leaves
Corpses of last spring perhaps
My yard lies fallow
Strewn with sticks and branches
Blown down from the forest
That crowds the back of my house.
Natural habitat
I named it
And God takes care of it very well.

Now and then a leaf stands up!
And runs with the breeze!
What gives it this delayed strength?

Then there’s the matter of fleas
Living in my favorite sitting place
Brought there by a visiting dog.
Even in a vacuum cleaner bag
They can live up to three months
Be blown out to live again
Resurrected to pester me
And the other dogs of our world.

I avoid extremes myself
Whether of cold or hot
Rough waters or dangerous drives.
What is this?
But the will to survive
Seeking optimum conditions?

Leaves, fleas and people
Have something in common
After all!




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Care and Feeding of Grandkids

Date: Jan 13, 2005
From: MJS
To: JB

The babysitting of grandkids has gone very well. They have been better for me than they are for their own parents, whatever the reason. Everything happened on time and in good order. They ate and slept as they should, didn’t cry at all, and only had one fight between them. In all the years I taught school and took students on field trips I worried less about what “might” happen than I do with my own grandkids. I would never forgive myself, and my daughter might not either, if anything severe happened.

On a lighter note, my daughter left me with three pages of directions, phone numbers, hints, orders and permission to visit the doctor. It was thoughtfully done. I had it folded up and in my back pocket. The first day, using the bathroom, it fell out into the toilet (yes, after, not before) and got pretty wet! I dried it off. Could not sacrifice this essential information! I just have to wash my hands every time I handle it! LOL

Date: Jan. 14, 2005
From: JB
To: MJS

I never have a problem over my grandkids. Of course, they are a little older than yours, between 6 and 15. My daughter-in- law is wonderful, shares so nicely with me. I am truly grateful to her for that, and she’s a good wife too. Remember how our aunt used to tell us to “get the good out of them while they are little”? Well, she was right! They have grown up so fast.

But it does exhaust me to have them more than two days. Being with children requires a kind of full attention that I am not used to anymore. I need those little catnaps! I don’t know how grandparents can raise kids. It has got to be a very hard job, even if necessary. God bless them all.




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Hope Chest

Date: Jan. 11, 2005
From: CW
To: MJS

Good morning! Yes, I am learning to read my email each morning first thing. As for writing my own thoughts, my senses are numb because all my energy is going into computerizing this accounting system at work. I feel that I walk around in a daze with nothing internally stirring. I am sure that work can do this to a person, but it’s a new sensation to me, not being able to get in touch with my thoughts and emotions. I don’t like being here. However, gainful employment is essential right now and I am almost done with this job.

I remember that quote: “Chop wood, haul water. Enlightenment comes. Chop wood, haul water.” This must be a chopping wood time.

I am still putting away Christmas. The memories keep me singing. We all need these treasures that take us from where we were to now, and bridge us into the future. We need a kind of “hope chest” somewhere. What’s in yours?

Date: Jan. 13, 2005
From: MJS
To: CW

My “hope chest” has all of my journals and a big binder with what I think of as my “important writings and pictures”, heirloom pictures too, and a piece of baby clothing from each of my kids. That’s the past. I keep that trunk by an exit door in hopes that if there is a fire, it will be saved!

My “future hope chest” could have a cookbook in it, “Good food and exercise for good health”. There should be some message of love from the Universe, maybe a beautiful poster. I would put the word “meditate” on a rock, and “travel” on another one, hoping that would inspire me to those ends. And I would like a handful of something sparkling for ideas to write about! I could use a cuddly toy to represent happy relationships with most everyone I know. And I would like to always have a printer that works. My printers have all been frustrating so far. So I could put in a ream of paper, knowing I might have to do all that writing or drawing by hand, but that would be O.K. I am sure I will think of more.




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Writing Class

Date: Jan. 10, 2005
From: MJS
To: CW

I am so pleased with my latest story, “Seeing the Black Knight and the Wizard”! It was a gift to me, you know. It just kept hanging out somewhere above my head, just out of sight but wouldn’t go away, so I finally wrote it down. The first draft took a couple of hours, but there are more hours in revisions. Now I just wallow in the pleasure of having done it, it pleases me so much!

There are three levels of meaning, and in each case the “I” is me. First it’s a fantasy story of battling forces, and I am on the edge of it observing. In the second, which is metaphorical, Chaos is what is the battle, and like many people, I cover my eyes and ears and grow more weary. The whole thing is a dream provoked by the storm, but I awake and find my “familiar”, a god-in-dog spirit that is with me and he leads the way. On yet another level, where I really started, the Knight and the Wizard are my impressions of two personalities that clash, over which I have no control.

No, I am not in a “writing class” exactly, although I do sometimes attend a women’s writing group at the community college. They just share around the table of seven to twelve women, read their pieces, and then everyone jumps in to praise or criticize constructively. It is hard to submit my writing to such scrutiny, but well worth it.

I am in a “writing class” spiritually. I cannot tell you how compulsive that is! The inspiration for my stories comes to me in many ways, through impressions or memories and insights that just beg to be written down. They wake me up at night. Once I start writing, it all just keeps tumbling out! It amazes me! Sometimes I find out what I really think when I write it down, and then it gets even better. I follow the leads, and they take me. I listen to the “voices” in my head, which can be just about anything, sifting out and ignoring what is promoted by fear or vain ambition. Sometimes my projects flop, but that’s OK.

I recommend the tapes by Carolyn Myss, “Spiritual Madness: the Dark Night of the Soul.” She has some great suggestions for dealing with the inevitable emptiness.





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Value of My Life

Date: Jan. 5, 2005
From: MJS
To: CW

One thirty, a.m. This is as good a time as any, since I fell asleep during the football game. But why should I wake wondering about the purpose and value of my life again?

If I try to stand outside myself and evaluate my life, north south eat and west, I haven’t got very far. I didn’t do anything grand like Mother Teresa, or even thousands of hours of service like my own Mother to the thrift shop and as much again to the Red Cross. I did work for the church for 17 years at half wages, so maybe that counts for something. I haven’t travelled far and don’t even want to very much. This life is not about covering space or other culture or having material possessions. I am not in line for any awards.

To the heights and depths of one life perhaps I have gone. Companion to this man, parent to these children, member of this church community, I have done some justice to all of that. If I compare this life to all the others I did not choose or apply myself to that I could have, this one isn’t much really. My husband’s spirit must be very valuable to Someone that I have this task of companionship to him. I liked teaching, being the administrator, and now the camp host, which are only slightly different functions really! They’re all “Big Mamas.”

And now I hear some call to go to the center, some huge space on the inside, a dot, inside a single atom, available to the poorest person in India or the richest person in the U.S., if one looks that way, or moves in that direction. “Keep writing,” says The Call. “It doesn’t matter who rejects, who accepts, who ignores what you write.” That’s what got me out of bed in the wee hours, keeps me awake for a while, because if I ignore that voice when it calls, it doesn’t call again the same way.

I am like water, my life is flowing way!
br>


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One Day At A Time

Date: Jan 14, 2005
From: CW
Well, what gets me up in the morning used to be a work routine that called me. I tend to be overly committed. When I have something that I feel responsible for, I give 125%. That’s not really balanced nor good for the rest of my life. I remember my Dad’s quote when I was a little girl: “Once a job has begun, never leave it is done. Be a labor big or small, Do it right or not at all.” I think this has stayed with me my entire life.

I do not hold myself to a routine however. What is in front of me is what I focus on. My husband makes the bed and does other things for the family. I think what gets me up is to see what the day has in store. It is no longer pre-planned, which gives me a freedom to allow the Universe to enter in. I am searching for that wonderment that will take my journey on this earth to the next place. I don’t know where that is, but I do know what I don’t want: just a job for money. However, one must eat and keep a roof overhead, so there is a bind there. I have always told my children to do what they love and everything else will be provided. I am still discerning what that passion is for me now! I cannot go on aimlessly. I have been in a Dark Night of the Soul for too long now, but I am still uncertain what path to take. I guess I will just keep opening doors.

Date: Jan 14, 2005
From: RAM

What gets me up is a long list of ToDo’s. The only real constant is change.

I think we are all where we are because of choices we have made; we an make other choices. Some choices limit future choices. There is always more than one option, though not all desireable or viable, but always more than one. And there are very few non-revesible decisions (except abortion and suicide). We change and grow if we want to. Not to decide is a decision too, a choice.




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What Gets Me Up in the Morning

Date: Jan 15, 2005
From: JB

What gets me up in the morning, now that work is not the motivator, quite frankly is usually the “call of nature”, if you get my drift. And immediately thereafter I am hungry. A shower starts my day, wakens my skin and clears out my head and I BEGIN while showering, to think of the day ahead. Sometimes I do start thinking before getting out of bed.

I think Mother Nature is nothing if not VERY consistent. Even in the weather. It is devoted to keeping things the same: patio tomato seed produces tomatoes, bibb lettuce seed produces bibb lettuce, acorn produces oak tree. People produce people. Somewhere in the U.S. the Dept. of Agriculture has a very climate controlled depository for seeds for everything from apples to wheat, in case some pest should attack and destroy a particular strain. Amazing!

Weather cycles repeat themselves. Look at hundred year flood plains for evidence. Its just that people’s memories are short or they don’t believe records. This is a “living planet”, but I didn’t really grasp that until I saw the bubbling pots of earth at Yellowstone. I heard a story once, about two red ants walking upon a Giant Redwood tree. One remarked to the other that he had heard that this tree was alive. Well, yes, says the other, but it hasn’t moved or changed a bit and I have been here my entire life!

Date: Jan 15, 2005
From: ET

Getting up in the morning IS the point. Life is for living ,experiencing, trying new things, so that you slide into heaven with a glass of champagne, covered in dirt, cuts and scratches from the fullness of your life. I didn’t make that up exactly, but I believe it’s true.

I have a letter ordering me to jury duty. I don’t think they will want me on a jury. I feel if a person has gotten that far in our judicial system they are probably guilty, and I want to see ALL the evidence, not just what the judge wants me to see. I don’t care WHY someone did what they did. If they did it, they’re guilty. You can think all you want, but once you act on it, you are responsible. That’s what I think.




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From Colombia, Central America

Date: Sun, 5 Dec. 2004
From: CRS (in Columbia, Central America)
To: MJR

I am missing you, and Dad and home also. A lot of doors in my life have been gracefully and gratefully opened and shut on this trip. And I think I’ve actually done everything I came here to do, aside from practicing a little more Salsa Dancing and Spanish, but I think I’ll manage those soon.

Truth is, I’m feeling really overwhelmed with the condition of humanity and the world at the moment. Sure, I see the sunsets, but I also see the seas that have turned black with pollution. I always thought, or at least hoped, that people would start changing when the seas turned black, and now I see them walking right by, taking no notice, and it makes me want to cry.

I plan on spending the holidays and my 28th birthday in Bogotá, where I have found good friends. Bogotá is renowned for their Christmas light displays, and then I will get back to Quito. I was dancing with a school there that has asked me to perform with them. I’d like to do that. As for love, I want to smother it with a pillow!!! I am so exhausted with the rollercoaster of emotions. I love and miss you. Thank you for your love and support. I feel it every day.

Date: Sun, 5 Dec 2004
From: MJS
To: CS (in Columbia C.A.)

It sounds like Paradise there! We had to cancel our road trip south due to coughs, not able to visit so many who are medically fragile. Maybe later. We’re not up to putting chains on the car either! Where will you be for Christmas? What’s next on your travel plans?

I fell asleep several times watching “Intend Your Life” on PBS. What does that say for me? LOL I need to get a creative project going here to pass the time, not elaborating on decorations or baking. Yard work is out. Painting appeals but I haven’t a vision for it. No pictures lurking in my brain at all. I hung a crystal over my computer to see if that would help inspire me. Hasn’t worked yet, but maybe tomorrow! I would like to intend away this cough.
Ho, ho, ho!





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A Really Happy New Year Day

Date: Jan. 2, 2005
From: MJS
To: CW

Now that was my idea of a great New Year’s Day! First I read the paper and had a good breakfast. A tsunami of caring is about to come upon Southeast Asia for the relief of some of their suffering. Then I watched the whole Rose Parade on T.V. for the first time in years, broadcast without commercials, with good commentators and good camerawork. Then I prepared food for coming guests. Your habitual loving attention to food preparation inspired me to make stuffed mushrooms, of all things! Gourmet won over efficiency for once. My family and a few neighbors came through and watched the games with us and we visited all day long. At the end I was very tired, and very satisfied. I even enjoyed the Rose Bowl football game. The mushrooms were a hit too.

I am sorry you live too far to visit like that. We always have so much to share. You are the best listener! This coming year we must get to that meditation retreat that we missed last year. I can sustain inner silence for no more than a few seconds at best and need some help in that department. We’re not finished sharing over Joseph Campbell, either. Perhaps we will never be done with him! His best line so far? “Participate joyfully in the sorrows of life.” Each word needs close examination. It’s rather like, “Be still and know that I am God.” That line has given me hours of reflection too.

Blessings on you now and always.

Date: Jan.2, 2005
From: CW
To: MJS

Dearest Friend:
Happy New Year! Yes, I am ready inside for that meditation retreat. I know it will bring a challenging spiritual gift to me. Campbell calls for slow reading, there is so much to process.

The change of years as measured by time always causes me to reflect upon the year past as well and the new one to come. With greatest joy I witnessed the marriage of my daughter. Thank you for sharing that day with me. Several good friends passed away. My younger daughter graduated, and my husband’s employment situation is much improved. I have also experienced a return to somewhat better health, and nothing is a greater blessing. And I have experienced the presence of angels walking with me to that return, including you. I thank God for you, your friendship and the love God sends through that vessel. May 2005 be a time of health, love and prosperity to us all!
r>


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Lessons from Christmas

From: MJS
To: CW

I don’t mind being awake in the night. I get some quality thinking time uninterrupted!

I re-learned something this Christmas. I watched my grandchildren through this season of anticipation and reward and feel for them and their parents. The anticipation built every day, aided and betted by TV ads and their friends and even their parents. They explored wrapped packages, feeling the contents, shaking them, and hoping. And then it all came to an abrupt end! They were surprised and pleased, or not surprised and not pleased. This one didn’t want a science kit, and that one has too many little plastic people already. Pick up sticks and felt pens did as well as bicycles. I remembered some of the gifts of my childhood, paint sets, dolls and stuffed animals, new pyjamas and little decks of playing cards I loved so much!

The day after Christmas is calmer, more orderly, and happier in man ways, boring, but not a roller coaster of desire and disappointment. What is really good about Christmas preparations is being distracted from the cold and dreary weather outside. It’s knowing that we’ve turned the corner so the days will surely grow longer and lighter now. It’s the decorative lights we need.

What we really need deep down is the reminder that God, however you call God, indeed the Whole Universe, loves each of us. The Universe loves ME, called me into existence just as I am, and holds me here. It has compassion for me. That’s why it’s important to focus on the meaning of the holiday, not on the gifts exchanged or new clothes or food and drinks. That sort of confidence makes one truly happy. Emotions are like fizz in a drink. That’s nice, but it’s not the drink.

This is something good about getting older! I am really happy with “my” new smoker, and new black tennis shoes for when I dress up! And I have already forgiven myself for everything I have eaten or will eat for the last ten days of December.
Hugs, MJS
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Feng Shui In the New Year

From: SP
To: MJS

Happy New Year!

I have been doing Feng Shui, so the windows in my kitchen sparkle. The lace curtains smell nice. I got the family room spiffed up and went through my closet (again) weeding out things I don’t wear. I got new pots and pans for Christmas so I put the best old stuff in the trailer and the rest in the trunk for give-away. I have a trunk full ready to go to Goodwill. I still have way too much stuff. Stuff! Stuff! Too much stuff! I am getting down to the hard-to-part-with things.

I got in an argument with my daughter on the phone, went to church although I didn’t want to, looked at the manger scene and started crying. The Baby Jesus got me. I got a good hug from a friend in the choir. I am off Wellbutren so I get choked up easily.

The day after Christmas a coyote ran across the road in front of us. We stopped and watched it race across the field until it was out of sight. I think the Trickster is playing with us! Love, S

Date: Jan 2, 2005
From: MJS
To: SP

Maybe that coyote was a little love message from the Universe! I have a book with lots of coyote stories in it, if you want to see it. He is a Trickster. In our neighborhood there is a coyote eating up wandering cats.

Personally, I get bird messengers. And No, they do nothing on me! In Tombstone once I awoke in the dark and asked for a bird sign the next day, and immediately an owl hooted! At the Klamath River once a line of pelicans so long I couldn’t count them flew over me. Birds fly over my path a lot when I travel, and other eye me right in the yard and through the window. One day last week I got a flock of pigeons overhead, then a hawk, and then a blue heron, all within 30 minutes. Today two birds flew across my path. Yesterday a whole flock of starlings wheeled and turned until I got right under them! I KNOW the Universe is watching me!

Sounds a little crazy, but it makes me feel good to be noticed so much.
Happy New Year to you too!
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Traveling Home Plans

From: MJS
To: CRS

I am OK with loaning you some money if you need it to get by. I can deposit to your local account. If your visa expires on the 10th and your plane ticket isn’t good until the 16th, how do you do that? Hang upside down like a bat in a tree for a week? LOL


Date: Jan. 3, 2005
From: CRS
To: MJS

Hey Mom, I have enough funds to keep me afloat until I return home, which I am planning on around the 16th. That’s really not long from now. I am pretty sure I’ll have work and a paycheck lined up for February, and yes, a portion of that first check will immediately go to paying off that stupid credit card.

My visa for Columbia expires on the 10th, not my “new” visa for Ecuador that I will get upon crossing that border. It just means I have to cross the Columbian border next week. And I will have no problem getting down there by the 10th. Then I have a few days in Quito to clean things up, say goodbyes, and dance some salsa.

My birthday was wonderful! I am still covered in salt from our sea visit. Me and my family and some gringo friends all went to a special beach together. I’m excited to get back to the house now and continue the party. I am teaching them how to make French toast tonight… nope, not vegan. But they’ve assured me that the chickens that layed these eggs were raised free and happy and with no amount of violence. They totally respect my diet, and although they aren’t quite willing to totally give up meat, they have switched to brown rice, brown sugar, whole wheat breads and pasta and have made their first purchase of soymilk this week. We all ate all vegetarian meals today for my birthday! Funny, huh! I will definitely come back and live with this family again. I am going to miss them terribly when I leave.

As I miss you! I will be thinking all kinds of warm thoughts of you as I get on the bus tomorrow and begin the first leg of a very long trip home. Much love, C.

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Best and Worst Christmas Ever

Date: Dec. 31, 2004
From: KHM
To: MJS

So much has happened! I had the best and worst Christmas ever.

On the way home from our celebration I was telling my husband, “Wasn’t that the best Christmas ever?” No sooner were we in the door than one of my sons called to complain about the presents I gave to his wife and daughter. I thought I had given them what they wanted, but somehow it didn’t seem “fair” to him, that I was playing favorites! He wasn’t happy with any explanation. This whole thing kept me awake till the wee hours. Next day my other son called to tell me how this story was going round and getting bigger. I would like to write him a letter, explaining again, and adding something about how he ruined MY Christmas. He’s so ungrateful for all I have done. He’s being disrespectful and unloving. He still blames me for my divorce. I think his wife is at the bottom of this. I am so hurt! What do you make of this?

Now we are in Florida for three months, and already my husband feels bored. I don’t know if I can take this! This is not my idea of pleasant retirement life! I was hoping they would want to come and spend time with us here, but now I am not so sure about that. We love this weather, but this conflict is always in the back of my thoughts.

One good story though. On the drive down here we narrowly avoided a really bad accident. A car came across the meridian, flipped three times, and landed right in front of us! Not a scratch on our car!

Date: Jan. 1, 2005
From: MJS
To: KHM

First I am really happy that you survived the potential driving disaster. Those travel angels must have been on duty for you.

About the family situation, that’s a tough one. If you are feeling hurt, then revenge is the bottom line, so now you “owe” him whatever he wants. You did the best you could with what you had in the past. It must be one of his life tasks to learn responsibility for where he is now and gratitude for what he does have. The only way you can win this game is not to play. Do what makes you happy.

The Rose Parade was great! I actually watched it all this year, for the first time, I think. The Rose Bowl game was good too, undecided until the end. Then I had a steady stream of company to visit. I am very tired from being up with grandkids last night while their parents partied. At least I get to go to bed early tonight. Happy New Year!




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A Day At A Time

From: CW

Well, what gets me up in the morning used to be a work routine that called me. I tend to be overly committed. When I have something that I feel responsible for, I give 125%. That’s not really balanced nor good for the rest of my life. I remember my Dad’s quote when I was a little girl: “Once a job has begun, never leave it is done. Be a labor big or small, Do it right or not at all.” I think this has stayed with me my entire life.

I do not hold myself to a routine however. What is in front of me is what I focus on. My husband makes the bed and does other things for the family. I think what gets me up is to see what the day has in store. It is no longer pre-planned, which gives me a freedom to allow the Universe to enter in. I am searching for that wonderment that will take my journey on this earth to the next place. I don’t know where that is, but I do know what I don’t want: just a job for money. However, one must eat and keep a roof overhead, so there is a bind there. I have always told my children to do what they love and everything else will be provided. I am still discerning what that passion is for me now! I cannot go on aimlessly. I have been in a Dark Night of the Soul for too long now, but I am still uncertain what path to take. I guess I will just keep opening doors.

Date: Jan 14, 2005
From: RAM

What gets me up is a long list of ToDo’s. The only real constant is change.

I think we are all where we are because of choices we have made; we can make other choices. Some choices limit future choices. There is always more than one option, though not all desireable or viable, but always more than one. And there are very few non-reversible decisions (except abortion and suicide). We change and grow if we want to. Not to decide is a decision too, a choice.
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What Gets Me Up in the Morning

Date: Jan 15, 2005
From: JB

What gets me up in the morning, now that work is not the motivator, quite frankly is usually the “call of nature”, if you get my drift. And immediately thereafter I am hungry. A shower starts my day, wakens my skin and clears out my head and I BEGIN while showering, to think of the day ahead. Sometimes I do start before getting out of bed.

I think Mother Nature is nothing is not VERY consistent. Even in the weather. It is devoted to keeping things the same: patio tomato seed produces tomatoes, bibb lettuce seed produces bibb lettuce, acorn produces oak tree. People produce people. Somewhere in the U.S. the Dept. of Agriculture has a very climate controlled depository for seeds for everything from apples to wheat, in case some pest should attack and destroy a particular strain. Amazing!

Weather cycles repeat themselves. Look at one hundred year flood plains for evidence. Its just that people’s memories are short or they don’t believe records. This is a “living planet”, but I didn’t really grasp that until I saw the bubbling pots of earth at Yellowstone. I heard a story once, about two red ants walking upon a Giant Redwood tree. One remarked to the other that he had heard that this tree was alive. Well, yes, says the other, but it hasn’t moved or changed a bit and I have been here my entire life!

Date: Jan 15, 2005
From: ET

Getting up in the morning IS the point. Life is for living, experiencing, trying new things, so that you slide into heaven with a glass of champagne, covered in dirt, cuts and scratches from the fullness of your life. I didn’t make that up exactly, but I believe it’s true.

I have a letter ordering me to jury duty. I don’t think they will want me on a jury. I feel if a person has gotten that far in our judicial system they are probably guilty, and I want to see ALL the evidence, not just what the judge wants me to see. I don’t care WHY someone did what they did. If they did it, they’re guilty. You can think all you want, but once you act on it, you are responsible. That’s what I think




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Addicted to Computers?

Date: 15 Dec 1004
From: MJR
To: JB

I am so glad your sister got to go to the Dr. Phil Show. I was sorry to miss it when we cancelled the trip! I have learned a lot about addictions in the last year. As for being addicted to computer time, Dr. Phil was dealing with that. Here are your addiction test questions applied to computers:
1. Is the computer making your home life unhappy for any reason?
2. Does it affect your reputation?
3. Do you feel remorse after a computer session?
4. Does it cause a decrease in your ambition or efficiency?
5. Do you feel you must return as soon as possible?
6. Did you use it beyond your last ounce of energy?
7. Are you eliminating other relationships in favor of computer time?
8. Are you on the computer and avoiding your usual chores and exercise?
9. Does it make you careless of the welfare of yourself or your family?
10. Do you use it long than you planned?
11. Do you use it to escape worry or trouble?
12. Do you commit or consider committing illegal acts on the computer?
13. Does it cause you to have difficulty in sleeping? (Even bad dreams count)
14. Do arguments, frustrations or disappointments within you create an urge to compute?
15. Have you ever considered self-destruction or suicide as a result of computing?
Compulsive computer users answer yes to at least five of these. This is based on Gambler’s Anonymous questions. This isn’t funny stuff to some people, believe me!

I found my two books by Marlo Morgan. Mutant Message from Down Under (1994) was my number one favorite for several years. What a marvellous story unfolding from a surprise place! I was the same age as she at that time I read it. When I had to move on from my last position, I remembered the scene where everything she has gets burned up, and she and the group just turn and walk off into the desert on a trek. How reluctantly we head off into new places, sometimes! How inspiring to know for sure that the Universe is really FOR us!
Hugs, MJR
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Pity Party

Date: Dec. 29, 2004
From: JB
To: MJS

Rained here had all night. My husband has a sinus infection and is now on antibiotics, just sitting there in the chair. I spent 2 hours on the phone trying to get the computer fixed. I finally have it done, but I wonder if getting a computer was such a good idea. It takes a lot of my life that I could reading or doing other things.

I am very upset that I couldn’t find my kids today and one has a birthday. I am having grandma pains. They don’t keep me in the loop near enough; grrr…I cried a bit, then got hold of myself. I had asked for and been promised some time with her, and now they are just gone. I think she’s over with the other grandma, so I guess I just have to hang on to my hugs and gift.

Hugs, JB

Date: Dec. 30, 2004
From: MJS
To; JB

Sounds like you’re having a pity party!
OK, so hubby has his drugs now and will likely recover, slowly.
The weather is not nice and won’t be better for a while. You’re stuck there.
Your family isn’t worshipping you properly.
Your computer is a pain.
I still love you! Hug, hug, and hug.
So turn up the heat, turn off the computer and read, do something on your bliss list. This is what January is all about.

Date: Dec. 30, 2004
From: JB
To: MJS

Okay!!! Okay, Yes, I am having a pity party. Let me have a little one, just for today. Tomorrow I will go out to breakfast with my friends and be healed!
Do families ever worship us properly? Naw! The other grandma called and let me talk with my granddaughter. They’ll be home Saturday. Had my nails done. I am definitely in a funk. What is happening in the world is too terrible. I should stop watching the news. His coughing and snorting kept me awake till the wee hours last night so I am going to take a nap now.

Lots of Football

Date: Dec. 26, 2004
From: ET
To: MJS

I hope you had a great Christmas with your family and friends. I’m so glad the holidays are over… back to my other life! There are still a couple of movies I would like to see, particularly Aviator. I had a great golf game last week, and look forward to another like that.

Date: Dec. 26, 2004
From: MJS
To: ET

Yes, we had really nice holiday! But a three-day weekend does seem to take up a whole week. We watched the grandchildren open presents in the morning. Not what they expected or wanted. My husband gave me a new fish smoker and he got tickets for car washes from me! Exactly what we wanted, of course. In the afternoon I made traditional turkey dinner for everyone, before we opened more presents. We played cards and talked. I think the anticipation built up is too much for the presents, not enough for just being together as a family, having fun together. The day after Christmas must be a great disappointment to many people. Then again, sometimes family just isn’t much fun at all. I do value my position as family matriarch and try to do it justice. When someone in the family won’t step up to all that social web work, I think the family flounders somehow.

I managed to do an old recipe that we used to love: stuffed mushrooms. Fry and chop some bacon, add chopped olives and onions and fry a little more, fill the mushroom caps and top with a tiny piece of cheese. I used to broil them (and forget to watch!), but I find they can be microwaved 20 secs each for good effect. No carbs there.

Do you realize there is football on TV every single day for the next two weeks! I am resolved to pay some attention. Football is the heavy game in the men’s world. Long ago I read a book, “Games Your Mother Never Taught You” by Betty Harrigan that really impressed me at the time. Men learn how to relate to others through the games they play, or follow. At the time I was having trouble with my boss, and that book opened my eyes. He was playing “Basketball”, expecting me to react quickly and appreciate all his cheering me on, but I was playing “Bridge”, a nice quiet game that keeps everything and everyone, where you just do what you say you’re going to do. I had to learn some basketball type moves. I used to ask friends “What game do you play or follow?” Women usually say they played volleyball, everyone rotating, taking turns at every position. Men’s games are a lot harder! Anyway, it pays to know the language of sports, if only so we women understand what men are talking about!

So other than golf, what games do you and your husband follow?

Family Life Troubles

Date: Dec. 24, 2004
From: RAH
To: MJS

My biggest problem here is that I cannot seem to get this “granny fanny” out of granny gear! My New Year’s resolutions to catch up, lighten up, and move it along, not necessarily in that order, but seriously.

News flash: I have been in touch with my Prodigal Son and expect to see him and his wife next month. Yesterday I got a card from my grandson at State Men’s Colony. He just turned 21 and sounds more mature than he did a year or so ago. What a hard way to grow up!

I am taking my mother (from her assisted living facility) to church today, then home for dinner with other guests. She used to make her own breakfast in her room. Since her last hip replacement, she’s slower, and she’s not able to get down for breakfast, so they escort her. She doesn’t like that. She calls me to complain every day.

Send speed angels and I will catch up soon!


Date: Dec. 24, 2004
From: MJS
To: RAH

There are time angels, I am sure of it! When I am behind, I ask them to stretch the time so I can get everything done that I ought. It always works! Just be sure to say “thank you!” Then there are those other angels that travel with me, two big guys like football players, that shoulder people out of my way when I need a space big enough more a motor home on the highway. They play tricks on me too, and make me laugh. Sometimes I think if I could turn around fast enough, I would see them.

Your Mother called to thank me for the flowers. I am glad she enjoys them. It’s hard to buy gifts for older folks, but I guess I am that old now too. Flowers from my daughter were my favorite Christmas present this year!

I have two daughters, two sons, two daughters in laws, one son in law, two grandsons and two granddaughters, and no two alike in any directions! How amazing! They are each a blessing in some way, if only a challenge to my own growth.

My resolution is to really clean out my closet, but I don’t feel very committed to it yet.

Hugs to you, MJS

Happy Where I Am Now

Date: Dec 21, 2004
From: JB
To: MJS
(Note: JB used to Snowbird but now stays put due to age and health problems.)

Returning to the computer after a short fast! I just had to see if I could stay away from it, and I was actually kind of busy, so it wasn’t too hard. I had a nice day with my grandchildren, which I love, but now I am exhausted after movie and walking too.

I was thinking while driving home the other afternoon how really happy I am to be settled here again, how comforting is known and loved never-changing landmarks. I was noticing the late afternoon winter sun on the mountains to the east that I can see from my kitchen, living room and porch. I often soak in the beauty of warm orange shadows on the Calicos, and after a cold stormy night I enjoy the early morning sparkle of light on snow-capped Ord Mountain. These are all permanent sights of Home for me, and then thinking further of how comforting they might be to my husband who has lived within their view so much longer than I have even.

Another good thing here is going into our favorite restaurants and being greeted by a waitress who cheerfully asks “How are you two today?” and sometimes taking too long to stop at the store for milk, OJ and fresh produce because I run into several old neighbors or former co-workers I haven’t seen in a while. For me, these things couldn’t happen anywhere else! This is HOME! It’s the people and topography, like in “Cheers,” a place where somebody knows my name.

I was also realizing the other evening how I have created an “assisted living” situation here for my husband, with so many alert to his situation. I just hope my eyes are still good enough to read all day, if I want to, when I get to his stage of life. There always seems so much to do I can’t get, find, and take enough time for myself to read. That is something I had more time for when we were rambling around essentially homeless for fifteen years. I don’t dare go into Costco or Barnes and Noble! Books jump into my hands!

Date: Dec. 21, 2004
From: MJS
To: JB

Isn’t it great to be happy where you are anyway? Just keep the spare room ready for me. Good weather is always a plus, but it seems like there is nowhere that it is perfect all the time.

My son and his wife are moving to a house of their own today. My granddaughter is pushing her Mom’s buttons with her attitude. I asked her what she could do to make herself happy? She didn’t know, but she perked up not long after. No matter how young, sometimes we’re best left to our own devices.

My Daughter Laughs

Date: Dec. 20, 2004
From: CRS
To: MJS

Mom, really I keep laughing with my friends about how all our mothers are going through this funny “red hat” phase unique to your generation, women who were raised with little options into an era with many, and the ways they are suddenly breaking out and branching out. Not that I personally want to write more, but I think especially interesting would be letters between mothers and daughter in this time period.

Life here in Columbia gets better by the minute. I move into the guest room of the house with my family. I LOVE THEM! We make meals together, dance together, do Christmas preps together, laugh together… they are sooo wonderful, and treat me like a daughter. Their twelve year old treats me like a sister, and my Spanish is improving by the minute.

I expect to be home at the end of January, to see my friends too and attend at least one wedding. When I was talking to them on the phone my Columbian family woke up and ran to check on me because they “thought someone was being murdered” from the amount of screaming and shrieking that was coming from my room!

I have a phone interview for leading tours with Where There Be Dragons. I don’t know which of their programs they are hiring for, India or South America. That’s all! Time for the sunset!

Date: Jan. 2, 2005-01-03
From: CRS
To: MJS

I celebrated the New Year with all my friends here by going to a rave deep in the jungle, and right on the beach, of the Tayona National Park. Didn’t go to bed till yesterday afternoon, and it was an unforgettable time, but I’m still recovering today.

The family has planned a trip for tomorrow to Playa Concha to celebrate my birthday. I am excited, but I’m sad to be leaving them the next day. I had originally planned to take my time getting back to Quito, but now I’ve used up those days hanging out here and I have to get across the border by the 10th before my Visa runs out, which means I have to hightail myself across the country. It will take 80 hours travel time, mostly by bus. Anyway, I started today on a juice fast, but I think I need more energy for this day of recovery, so I’m going to go find vegetables to make some food. And then I’m going to take a big fat nap! Love, CRS

Staying In Touch

Date: Dec. 20, 2004
From: CU
To: MJS

MJ, I don’t want to lose touch either! It’s been one heck of a year. As I think you know, this is my second year of grad school and I will go into internship and licensure next year. I lost both my parents this year and am in my last year of having kids at home. Big transitions! I will be flying to Florida in another week. Any chance of catching up this week, maybe Thursday? Meet at church services? At least let’s have a long phone call. Let me know what works for you. CU

Date: Dec. 20, 2004
From: MJS
To: CU

I am so glad to hear from you! It does sound like you have had a hectic year. Sorry, meeting at church won’t work. I do go to church after an eighteen-month hiatus, but I have a lot of irons in the fire too. The house phone has been disconnected since the blitz of elections started, and we find we don’t miss it at all. I will be home through January, then Snowbirding in the desert. Email works well everywhere.

Surprise! My husband is attending Gambler’s Anonymous. He decided he’d rather be married than keep that mistress. We have a lot to talk about.

Do you still have your dream of having a small farm? Just leave me a parking space and I will come help feed the animals and do the work. I actually have the name of a goat farm near Sweet Home, where the owner said I could come and spend a day, to see if I really liked it. Maybe you would like to come too? Might satisfy the need to know…

You’ll be interested to know my daughter is travelling in South America, having all the travel genes in the family, I do believe! She walked 550 miles on the Camino del Santiago in Spain last year, and wrote a book about it, but it hasn’t sold yet. She’ll be home this winter to revise it again and catch up with the rest of her family.

The best of holidays to your and your family! “Participate joyfully in the sorrows of life.” That’s a great line from Joseph Campbell. MJS

Acquiring an RV

Date: Dec. 20, 2004
From: MKH
To: MJS

Since PC couldn’t come here, due to fog of all things, I am not spoiling the surprise now by telling you we bought a used 5th wheel! My husband is really more excited about it than I am, but that’s “boys and their toys.” Anyway, now we can meet you when you Snowbird. We bought the first one we looked at. It has a TV/VCR, bathroom with tub/shower, some kind of stereo system, refrigerator/freeze and convertible couch-bed with a Queen size bed as well. There is an auto-level, jacks, ten-gallon propane, outside shower for rinsing off and a nice shade cover that extends out. It is very clean and looks pretty comfy. We parked it next to the house where we have our RV hook-up. I want to test some of the stuff out before we take it some as-yet to be determined place. He is sure everything works. Our next major purchase will probably be a new truck to pull it. There is just room for us and the dog. He has grown very attached to this puppy.



Date: Dec. 20, 2004
To: MKH
From: MJS

It sounds like a very nice camping unit! By all means try everything out while it is still in the driveway, including the shower. My husband did the same thing to me, thinking everything was just fine. I found leaks at the faucets. He wouldn’t drive it either, for practice, before we were to leave on a long trip. So I drove it over to the supermarket parking lot and did some circles and between the lines parking and found out how that went. Made me feel more competent, more secure, especially when I notice how he is “losing it” in little ways. I wonder about his hearing, and when he is sick, the whole world has to come to a stop!

I love my motor home, my little house. It has everything I need right at hand, including the computer, sewing machine, sound system, yard furniture tucked away, my golf clubs, and next time I am taking my old cat along. I really enjoy camp hosting. Something to do, lots of people to talk with, beautiful sites in good campgrounds: what could be better? Of course, it gets terrible mileage, but as one RV fan explained to me, “That’s terrible for a car, but great for a house!” He was so right.

May you enjoy your vacation home every bit as much! I know you’re a few years away from retiring, but no sense waiting until then to get the hang of it!

Coming and Going Holidays

WBF Col 5 Coming and Going
womenbefriends@yahoo.com

Date: Dec. 18, 2004
To: MJS
From: PC

Hi MJ,
Bummer, bummer. We got fogged in at the airport. Flights delayed, cancelled and diverted for three days. I was glad that I could call someone and get a ride home. People had been there for twelve hours before me and the airport was an absolute madhouse. They did not update boards and didn’t know what to tell people. That airline does not compensate for weather problems. To rebook would have cost $200 more and the next possibility just wouldn’t give me enough time there. So I bagged it for now. But I am disappointed. I was looking forward to some sun.

Meanwhile I went shopping with a friend here for Christmas gifts for women and children at the shelter. We went to Wal-Mart with the church money and spent $600 for 41 women and 29 children. Her daughter’s class is going to wrap them. She would have shopped by herself, and I told her that God had his ways of finding her some help. Back to my own decorating.


Date: Dec. 18, 2004
To: PC
From: MJS

I am so sorry you didn’t get out for the trip! The fog lifted here yesterday and now the sun is shining brightly. Oh well, the Universe knows what it is doing, I guess. We have to trust that sometimes.

My son and his wife are moving out (again) this week. I am supposed to help in the afternoon. Got the plans set for Christmas Eve and Day. I chatted with our cousin Charles today for a long time. He has a new remedy for improving the immune system but I declined to try it for now. He has never read Joseph Campbell, so I am ahead of him in some small way. I do appreciate that he thinks women gave up a lot for “liberation”, that women are smarter than men, and have a more sensible life in general. I feel like I am heard when I talk with him.

Merry Christmas to you and all the family! Blessings always!

Keep Your Women Friends

WBF Col 4 Keep Your Women Friends
womenbefriends@yahoo.com
Date: Dec 17, 2004
From: MJS
To: CW

What a wonderful visit we had! And yes, they are all too short and too far between, and we will just have to work around the obstacles as they arise. We are not leaving to Snowbird until February this year, so some how we will get a chance to visit. I know you’d like to write a book, but maybe later. Meanwhile, let’s make good use of this modern marvel: email!

My grandmother told me this: “Always keep your women friends. You will need them.” She didn’t really tell me a lot, but I have never forgotten that good advice, and she was perfectly right too. Husbands have a lot of good points, but only another woman really understands. We have so much to talk about! Church, children, health, spiritual insights, some unmentionables, but we’ll get to it all. I wish we could meet for coffee every day. This will be a modern version, right?

I didn’t remember to ask you about Power of Myth (Joseph Campbell). Have you finished it yet? What do you remember most from it? I think I was most impressed with his advice to “Live joyfully the sorrows of life.” I have missed out of some good by avoiding the feeling of the bad. “Living joyfully” would be the best thing in life, and I bet we can’t have one without the other. I think one of his best insights is that we are not committed to a person in a marriage, but to the relationship itself. It’s a lot of work and sacrifice to make that relationship work, in and out of the years and circumstances.

Happy to report I exercised four times this week. I have a new purple outfit for the Red Hat shindig tonight, with a red blazer. With a red hat, I am as bright as the Christmas tree already! My younger daughter will be home in the New Year, and my younger son and his wife will be moving out to their own home. Change is good!
Hugs, MJS

This n That

Date: Fri., 17 Dec.
From: MJR
To: JB

My wandering daughter is coming home in late January for sure. Meanwhile she is teaching English in exchange for her accommodations with some family there in Columbia, and teaching Salsa dancing evenings towards certification as a dance teacher. Says she will be here through May, but in my heart I know if some great opportunity shows up, she’ll jump for it. Don’t women have great opportunities these days?

Kids in stores think my husband is Santa, with his white beard and hair! He gets a kick out of it and tells them they’re going to get “everything they want”, right in front of their wide eyed parents! LOL

I have been trying to meditate morning and evening for a few minutes, but the monkeys chatter in my head every time. I have noticed that I sleep better afterwards, though.
Hugs, MJS



Date: Fri. 17 Dec 2004
From: JB
To: MJS

Guess I am not really addicted to my computer…yet! I only hit two of the 15 questions on addiction with a “yes”. Thank goodness I get to have two of my grandchildren all day Monday next while their mother takes the others to a school concert away. I think we will bake cookies and maybe take in one of the new movies. This means I must get things done in the house, but I won’t spend too much time moving the dust around. If I get blamed for anything with the kids or grandkids I don’t know about it. Maybe ignorance can be bliss. I am blessed with a wonderful daughter in law, mother to my grandkids and I really think she likes me. She has offered my son back a few times, but I refused. He’s not always the easiest guy to be around, but she doesn’t seem to blame me for that, for which I am thankful.

Our book club meets the fourth Monday of the month, and this time the book is Mutant Message from Down Under (Marlo Morgan). I think I read it before, but it would be worth another look.

Did I mention about my massage last week? It was wonderful! She strongly that suggested I need to pay more attention to the tightness I feel, as there might be some old scar tissue, so I have been doing extra exercises and bought a different pillow that gives me better support. I scheduled another massage. It was really a treat, something I think I should treat myself to more often. Yes!